Top 10 of Our Favorite Hypothetical Ridiculous Texts Between Superheroes

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  • 01
    Text - oo Super 4G 3:44 PM 90% Messages Contacts Diana Your city is under attack! The sun has disappeared and white death is falling from the sky! That's just called winter. I guess you don't have snow in Themyscira? We do not. How do I stop it from making my thighs cold? Leggings Unacceptable. I will slay the God of winter and return the sun. Your problem solving skills are real outside the box, you know that? IEXTS SUPERHERDES
  • 02
    Text - Super 4G 3:44 PM 90% Messages Superman Contacts I'm not sure I understand this holiday you invited me to. Oh. Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus by exchanging gifts. For children the gifts are brought by Santa Claus. When do Jesus and Santa arrive to give and receive their gifts? They don't actually come. How rude. When was the last time you spoke? We've never spoken It's a religious belief. You don't actually talk to what you believe in. I believe in Zeus. We last spoke on Tuesday.
  • 03
    Text - o0 Sprint 4G 6:52 PM 90% Messages Contacts Flash Can you come up to the Tower? We need your help. I'll be right there. Who is attacking? No one but someone ate my chips and no one will fess up. I need you to lasso the truth out of the team. My lasso is a gift from the gods, not a toy to settle petty squabbles. Someone ate your ice cream too. So this is the day the Justice League dies. Whoa. Not you. You're good. I'll see what I can do about your chips. EXTS SUPERHERDES FROM
  • 04
    Text - Green Arrow Contacts Messages I just sent you the battle plans for fighting Darkseid. There's nothing in my inbox. I do not trust man's electronic mail. I sent it tied to a Falcon. Oh god the Falcon just flew through my window. It's so big and it's everywhere. What do I do!? Put on your Falconer glove or gauntlet. I don't have a Falconer glove! Oh.Do you have any small mice for feeding? NO! He's freaking out and knocking everything over. He's making a nest on the fridge! WHAT DO I DO!? Le
  • 05
    Text - oo Wonder 4G 6:52 PM 90% Messages Superman Contacts How's the new job? Being the God of War is fine but the gods of Olympus are pretty sexist. I'm getting paid 70% of what Ares made for doing the same job. What do they even pay a God of War in? Dead bodies and souls. You want more of those??? NO! But it's a matter of principle. EXTS SUPER HERDES
  • 06
    Text - eоо ВАT&T 4G 6:52 PM 52% Messages Wonder Woman Contacts So what are your weaknesses? What do you mean? I'm just making a list. Green Lantern can't affect yellow, Superman is hurt by Kryptonite, Flash is bad with cold. What about you? Put down nothing You're saying you don't have any weaknesses? I'm saying if I did I wouldn't be dumb enough to tell people what they are. (ЕXTS SUPERHERUES
  • 07
    Text - Diana Messages Contacts I'm glad we've been able to change your perspective on the world of men. Yes, I used to think that men were violent threatening fools. But meeting you and the league has taught me there is hope for man. Excellent. I'm also trying to reach out and hear the opinions of more men. I just joined this thing called Twitter. should check my replies. Diana no! EXTS SUPERHERDES
  • 08
    Text - JLA Messages Contacts Great news everybody! Iris is pregnant! My condolences. Fatherhood is terrible... Damian is the worst What is pregnant? Pregnant. We're gonna give birth to a new life. Oh. Excellent. I know a great place to get clay to make your baby Where do you think babies come from? You mold a small human from clay and imbue it with magic. That's... um. Seriously we all hate Damian right? He is of bad clay. EXTS SUPERHERDES FROM
  • 09
    Text - Batman Contacts Messages Why did Luthor go free? got a confession out of him! Yeah, that didn't work out. Polygraphs aren't even admissible in Court, they're not accepting a confession under Lasso of Truth. What if I testify? You have no identification and were born from clay and lightning. Under the law you don't exist That probably means I can't be arrested if I crash my invisible jet into house, right? Officially I can't condone that. Unofficially, the skies are clear and his address i
  • 10
    Text - Superman Messages Contacts Sol have to ask, what's with the cape? What do you mean? I'm a superhero, we all wear саpes. Why do people think that? It's really just you and Batman. His makes sense, he's trying to look like a bat, but I can't figure out why you wear one. Oh ... I guess it just looks nice. You only wear one because Batman does, don't you? You can't prove that. I've got a lasso of truth that says can. ПЕXTS SUPERHEROES FROM

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